OH SPARE ME PLS













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    Date: Wednesday, October 31, 2007
    Time: 10:50 PM

    to Mlissa
    ok, fine
    i'll tell you
    it's not all because i'm being emo by choice alright?
    his death anniversary is coming up
    the day that HE left this world
    the day that concluded that I would NEVER see him again
    how do you think that makes ME feel?
    sure, you were close to him
    but you never actually LIKED him
    you never LIKED him the way I did okay?
    he was a brother to you
    but to me he was more than that, ok?
    he wasnt just one of those random guys in our gang
    he was the only one really that was special....
    i know it sounds cheesy, but i cant really help it
    i miss him, Mlissa, and planning his anniversary is harder than expected
    every thing i have to do for this thing is just torturing me
    will he like it? would he want us to do this?
    it's confusing, it's hurting, it's mind straining
    i know i volunteered to do this, thinking it would make me somehow feel better
    but in reality, it's killing me on the inside
    it's eating me up
    it's making me feel terrible on the inside
    no matter how many times i try and hide the feeling, it wont go away
    it never will
    i dont want this job
    heck, i dont even want to be a part of it
    but i promised
    and i keep my promises...all the time...
    because Daniel always kept his.............

    (typed on 31st October 2007)


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